The Vehicle: 2002 Ford Focus, aka The "Frankenfocus"
The Job: Check front brakes because of a weird noise, replace rear brake shoes
The Place: The Proto-Mechanic Garage
Estimated Time: 5 hours
So, for the last month I have been hearing a sound from the front of the car. It sounds like brakes grinding. Got up early Sunday morning to get a good start. Had the first front tire off at 9: 30. The front brakes look fine. On to the rear brakes. Fun Fact: Apparently Proto-Mechanic has issues with the direction a clock goes in. I was pretty sure I snapped a lug... and then proceeded to almost do it on the next one. I should have know that this was an inauspicious start.
It took me thirty minutes to get the jack stands set where I was happy with them. Removed both back tires. It was at that point that I could have turned back if I wanted to. My out was there, but I did not take it, because I am an idiot.
First anticipated issue: Drums won't come off. No sweat, I'll tap 'em with a hammer. No joy. I was expecting this. I'll just un-tension them and...
First unanticipated issue: Unlike the last brake job I did, there is no little hole in the drum to get to the tensioner. Alright, let's have a closer look. I see nothing except rust, brake dust and bolts.
First call to Master-of-Sport-Mechanic-and-All-'Round-Great-Guy, My-Personal-Mechanicing-Lifeline, Terry.
PM: "There is no hole to tension the shoes."
Master of Sport Mechanic: "Sure there is. Look for a rubber cap."
PM: "I don't see one."
All-'Round Great Guy: "Are you sure?"
PM: " Yes, I'm... wait. There it is."
Terry: "Just work a screwdriver in there and loosen 'em."
PM: "No dice, bub. I have two inches of clearence."
Terry: "Well, see if there are four bolts on the back side."
PM: "There are."
My Mechanicing Lifeline: "Well, just loosen them."
PM: "Is there a size between 11mm and 10mm."
Terry: "No, why?"
PM: "'Cause nothing fits."
Terry: "Is it a six point or twelve point nut."
PM: Counting "Six."
Terry: "And Nothing fits?"
PM: "No. Wait... those arn't bolts. They are round, like rivets."
Terry: "Well, that's weird."
PM: No shit. "Yeah."
So, against my better judgment we have to take the bearing cover off.
Terry: "Just pop the cotter pin out."
PM: "There ain't one."
Unanticipated issue number two: Terry: "No cotter pin?"
PM: "Nope."
Terry: "Well, what is holding the nut on?"
PM: "Looks to be a clip with six flanges, one around each side of the nut."
Terry: "Well,... um, I guess just bend the flanges back."
PM: "You guess?" That's comforting.
Terry: "Yeah."
I hang up and bend the flanges back and reveal the nut and find that, of course, I have no socket near big enough to fit the nut.
Terry: "It should come off no problem."
PM: "It won't budge."
Terry: "What about needle nose pliers?"
PM: "Nope."
Terry: "The guy takes it off with his hand in the video I am watching."
PM: "Unless he's the Hulk, it is a dirty trick of smoke and mirrors."
Awesome. Guess where I'm headed?
Off to the Zone... Dunta-Dun-Dunta... Auto-Zone where I drop twenty three bucks on a 1-1/16 socket and the next two sizes up. Then we have to do a bit of stuff in town. When I get back the nut comes off and lo and behold it is not one nut it is two. The first is just a wee slip of a thing. so, I bend the flanges out some more and... the 1-1/16 socket will no longer fit. METRIC!!!
Back to the Zone... Dunta-Dun-Dunta... Autozone, where I swap the larger SAE sockets for a 26 and a 27mm socket. I get back. The two nuts are actually three nuts. I keep going. The three nuts is actually four nuts and the flange will no longer bend without breaking.
Second Call to Master-of-Sport-Mechanic-and-All-'Round-Great-Guy, My-Personal-Mechanicing-Lifeline, Terry.
Unanticipated issue number three: Terry: "Four nuts? I never saw anything like that."
Whenever a guy with 50 years experience, ASE qualifications out the wazoo and smarts to boot says, "I never saw anything like that." You know you are in over your head.
Terry: "Break the clips."
PM: "Do they sell them seperate?"
Terry: "I imagine. Hey, did you check the bearings I sent you to see if they come with the clips?"
Lesson: Always check the boxes of parts. You never know what you will learn.
This had not occured to me. By the way, Terry sent me a set of break shoes and a coupla bearings that he just happened to have laying about that actually fit the Frankenfocus. So, lesson learned: check the boxes first.
PM: "Yes, they do."
Terry: "Just break 'em off and the drum should come right off."
Then Master-of-Sport-Mechanic-and-All-'Round-Great-Guy, My-Personal-Mechanicing-Lifeline, Terry had to go do some actual work himself and so left me to my own devices.
I broke the flange clips and the last nut came off. A couple of solid whacks with the hammer and the drum came off.
Repeat with other side, except now I just broke the flanges and took all four nuts off at once. EPJ.
Now to the shoes.
Well, they came off easy enough.
I am goin to buy a set of brake spring thingy's before I do... IF I do shoes again. Logan and I grunted and strained but finally got both sets of shoes on with only a moderate amount of fuss. I followed Master-of-Sport-Mechanic-and-All-'Round-Great-Guy, My-Personal-Mechanicing-Lifeline, Terry's advice of doing one shoe at a time, leaving the other side exposed as a guide. This was a solid idea. Glad I though of it.
So, except for bent pin that bent because I put it in the wrong hole even though Logan thought it went in the hole it actually went up going in, it was not a big deal.
Unanticipated issue number four: Then we had to put the drums back on. Remeber that there was not a hole to get to the tensioner? Well the tensioner sits betwixt the shoes and I can't figure this out to save my life. I look it up online and I get:
Hit Number 1: A video of a brake job on a 2001 Focus where the guy chews a lot of gum and does not actually show the brake job, he just tells us that he did the brake job. Asshole.
Fuming.
Hit number 13: A video of a guy doing a brake job on a 2002 Ford Something Else where he just fits the drum back on like breathing. Smug bastard.
Let the simpering begin.
Hit 39: A diagram of a brake job on a 2002 Ford Focus that says to seperate the small cam to loosen the shoes. I have no idea what this means.
I am swearing AT myself now.
I go outside and Logan has figured out what that means. You have to press a screw driver between the unmoving small cam and the moving larg cam that is not round but shaped like a "Q" and a "G" looped together. Damned if this does not work. Drums go on like a champ. Smug bastard asshole that I am, in my joy I forget that with the clamps on the nuts on the cover for the bearing, I do not have a socket big enough. Sigh.
I have to go to a concert for my Mother-in-Law. After the concert I swing by the Zone... Dunta-DunDunta... Auto-Zone! to swap out my last unused socket. And they are closed.
But Oh-Oh-Oh-O'Reilly's... Auto Parts is open! Go figure the six dollar SAE socket does not fit as well as the 30mm at 9 bucks. 30mm. Prolly need that again next week. Get home and fit it all back together.
Brakes work fine.
The noise is still there.
Son of a bitch.
Thing I learned:
1. A hammer is a good friend.
2. It is better to stay calm.
3. A calm son is good to have in a pinch.
4. Master-of-Sport-Mechanic-and-All-'Round-Great-Guy, My-Personal-Mechanicing-Lifeline, Terry still has me beat. Smug bastard.
5. Check your parts boxes first
6. Avoid doing brake shoes.
7. Buy a damned spring tool.
8. The internet SUCKS!!!
Total time with breaks for shopping, parts runs and a Christmas Cantata... Eleven Hours. OMG!!!
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